Ugly George

So if your name is George, this isn’t about you. Just sayin

Knee brace

At one of my last PT sessions, my amazing PT David asked me how often I wore my brace. I said, “Ugly George? Only when I’m having a lot of pain.”

“Ugly George?”

Yes. George because… I dunno it was the first name I thought of. Ugly because… it is.

I’ve learned a lot about Ugly George since March (when I had surgery.) First, all braces aren’t alike. And drugstore braces are not necessarily good for you. (Shout out to my PT to helped me learn what to buy and measured one that fit correctly.)

Second, a brace isn’t good for long-term use, but it can take the load off when there’s going to be extra stress on a joint. I wore it in the Pride Parade. I’ve pulled it on when I was going to be doing a lot of walking at a conference. And tonight, after a long day of visits, my knee ached– but I had an appointment with my Trainer! So Ugly George came along for the work out. 30 minutes of core, and 20 minutes on the treadmill.

I got home, showered, and iced my knee. I sprayed Ugly George with Febreze (cause he gets a little funky).

Life goes on. The Good. The Bad. The Ugly (George.)

Can you hear Me NOW?

Can you hear Me NOW?
A sermon for the people of God
at Greenbelt Community Church
Greenbelt, Maryland
June 16, 2019

Thank you for the warm welcome. It is good to be back here, and to worship with you. One of these days, I will have to join you and hear my dear friend Pastor G preach… perhaps someday soon!

Hear the Word of the Lord…

Proverbs 8:1-9 (The Inclusive Bible)

Doesn’t Wisdom call?
Doesn’t Understanding raise her voice?
On the hill along the road,
at the crossroads, she takes her stand;
beside the city gates of the town,
in the gates themselves, she cries out,
“Women and men, people everywhere,
I’m calling out to you!
I cry out to all of humankind!
You who are simple, learn how to make sound judgments!
To the foolish among you, use your common sense!
Listen closely, for what I say is worth hearing,
and I will tell you what is right;
for my mouth will speak the truth,
and my lips hate to lie.
Everything I say is right;
none of it is twisted or crooked.
All of it is plan-spoken to those who understand,
clear to those seeking knowledge.”

 

====Please pray with me====

Holy and loving One,
We so often do not listen,
We so frequently do not ask,
And we really don’t like a change in our personal agendas…
But you, Divine One,
Know us so well.
Capture our hearts
Get our attention
And may the words I offer be in tune
With your heart
And Your holy Word.
Amen

====================

CA310646
© 2005 Masahide Kanzaki, Flickr | CC-BY | via Wylio

While I was a music student at Ohio State, we analyzed various scores and printed music for our theory and composition classes. Sometimes we picked the music apart as a class, a kind of joint venture of a musical autopsy. Other times, we were handed a portion for an exam, and were expected to dissect it on our own. Complex or simple, I had a deep appreciation for the great works we studied. But the music that never failed to amaze me were the ones that were written when the composer was… deaf.

Their inner muse was so strong, so well-developed, that though they were deaf, they could create symphonies and string quartets and never hear a note of it. The works of composers like Beethoven and Smetana, Fauré and Vaughn Williams stunned me when I realized that they never heard them performed.

They never stopped listening. Even when they could not hear.

  • Our texts this morning invite a new kind of listening. They ask us, even though we may be tone deaf to God’s speaking to us, that we try and listen anyway!
  • Whether it is seen or known, the Scriptures this morning invite us to HEAR the words of truth, to become aware of the voice of Wisdom and Understanding.
  • Our texts this morning invite us to engage with the Created world around us in new ways. To see. To hear. To praise. To worship. To respond.

The problem is that we are, so often, slogged down in the everyday drone of life. And it drowns out our attempts to love and follow God!

Gotta pay the bills
Gotta pick up the kids
Gotta do the laundry
Gotta fix dinner
Gotta get groceries
Oops the cat threw up… gotta clean that up.

And then as every parent knows… the end of the school year hits:
Gotta get teacher gifts
Gotta help the kids study for exams
Gotta get poster board for that last project
Gotta find that band shirt for the concert (And does it still fit? That was Christmas!)
Gotta get good seats at graduation
Gotta sign the kids up for camp
Gotta find a hotel for vacation

AND… if you are dealing with a chronic illness…
Gotta get a scan and blood test
Gotta see this specialist
Gotta try a new medication
Gotta
Gotta
Gotta

We are on this treadmill existence, going nowhere fast!

The Divine invites us –
To reprogram
To reboot
To re-engage with the world around us!

Listen! Think! Look! Praise!

Listen! God says: “Doesn’t wisdom call?”
Think!  God suggests: “Doesn’t Understanding raise her voice?”
Look!   God’s people respond: “When I look up at your heavens…
Praise! God’s people sing: “How majestic is your name in ALL the earth!”

2012-02-16 17.01.12
The *@%$!! Washington Beltway

That’s not “normal” mode for human beings. Well… I know it isn’t for me. I might do OK at the “Praise” part on Sunday mornings. But by Tuesday afternoon’s rush hour… um… well… there are different words on my tongue.

Charles Hummel published a booklet in 1961 titled The Tyranny of the Urgent.  In this small volume, he suggested that there is always tension between things that are urgent and things that are important—and far too often, the urgent wins.

Yes. Far too often, the urgent wins. Anyone who has ever had their tasks changed at work because the Boss says, “I gotta have this today” knows exactly what Hummel meant!

We who are locked into our smart phones and Outlook calendars, and have trouble remembering to PRIORITIZE what God thinks is important… Can we learn to not just do the next thing?? Not just respond to the next email, the next tweet, the next voicemail?

I’m not there yet. But I’m working on it. I’m really bad at “unplugging” actually, but I keep trying. Because how can I hear “the still, small voice” of God when I’m not listening for it? “CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW???” God asks…

Um… nope. Not really…

migration
More seagulls than people!

Every year, I look forward to vacation, when I try to reconnect with the created world around me. Quite honestly, I am looking forward to getting away… Before I see you again in July, we will journey to a place where there are more seagulls than people. Where the loudest noise I hear is the wind in the sea grass and palm branches, and the biggest decision I have to make is where I will take my afternoon nap… on the beach? …in the hammock? …or at poolside?

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Sunset over a tidal marsh.

And as my blood pressure goes down, and freckles reappear on my nose… I breathe deeply and watch the day unfold at a pace that has nothing to do with the clock, and everything to do with the rhythm of sun and sand and sea. I make time at sunset to watch the birds come in to roost in the marsh, and see the shadows grow longer over the sand dunes. I hold star charts overhead and marvel at the number and intensity of the planets and constellations when the city lights are fading. I look for sea turtle hatchlings.

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An egret taking off over a tidal marsh.

In short, I am immersed in the physical world I can see, whether or not I can understand it. Because I don’t need to be able to explain the reasons why stars twinkle to marvel at the number of them. I can watch fireflies (or lightning bugs – whatever you call them) and not know if they are advertising for a mate or just doing what they do… blink… blink… blink…

We are far from being hunter-gatherers or shepherds like the writer of the Psalms. But even if you ARE a botanist or an astrophysicist, you can still marvel at the way that our planet moves from season to season, and sustains humans and animals.

Terry Tempest Williams in her book When Women Were Birds wrote:

Once upon a time, when women were birds, there was the simple understanding that to sing at dawn and to sing at dusk was to heal the world through joy. The birds still remember what we have forgotten, that the world is meant to be celebrated.

The world is meant to be celebrated! BUT – also to be cared for… The Psalmist was aware that the entire Created world was under humanity’s dominion. Everything in the air, the sea, and on the land was given to humanity to care for…

How aware are we of our stewardship…
When plastics pile up in our landfills and pollute our oceans?
When we depend on fossil fuels in increasing ways?
When we do not ensure that the vulnerable, the weak and the hurting have clean water, clean air, and enough food?
When Flint, Michigan still does not have clean water after 5 years…
When there are famines in one part of the world, and food waste in the other?

Doesn’t Wisdom call?
Doesn’t Understanding raise her voice?
Doesn’t the Holy One call to us, asking, “Can you hear Me NOW?”

Today –

When you walk out into the warm sunshine or cope with a sudden summer thunderstorm,

Who will you thank?
Who will you praise?
Whose heart will speak to yours?

Can you hear Me NOW? God asks…

May our answer be… YES.

Amen.

Sunday Prayer: Unfolding

I wrote this prayer as part of the daily offerings on RevGalBlogPals. (Original posting is HERE!) I’m cross-posting it here because it comes from my heart and spirit, not knowing all the answers, but knowing Who holds them…

Peaceroses
Chicago Peace rose in our back yard.

Holy One,

We watch things unfold,
day by day,
sometimes hour by hour,
never really knowing why or when
there will be a turn of events
or changes in our plans.

Unfolding,
slowly, gently, melding,
You help us in synchronicity
with Your Grace.

Sometimes we won’t listen.
Sometimes we bolt the other way.
Always, always, always,
There You are,
Bending out the next petal,
Subtling shading our hearts’ responses.

Unfolding,
perfectly, smoothly, humbly,
Your heart changing ours.

Unfolding…

So may it be. Always and forever. Amen.

Breakfast on the Beach

Breakfast on the Beach
A sermon for the People of God
at Bethesda United Church of Christ
April 28, 2019
Rev. Deborah Vaughn, BCC

John 21:1-14
1 After these things Jesus showed himself again to the disciples by the Sea of Tiberias; and he showed himself in this way. Gathered there together were Simon Peter, Thomas called the Twin, Nathanael of Cana in Galilee, the sons of Zebedee, and two others of his disciples. Simon Peter said to them, “I am going fishing.” They said to him, “We will go with you.” They went out and got into the boat, but that night they caught nothing.

Just after daybreak, Jesus stood on the beach; but the disciples did not know that it was Jesus. Jesus said to them, “Children, you have no fish, have you?” They answered him, “No.” He said to them, “Cast the net to the right side of the boat, and you will find some.” So they cast it, and now they were not able to haul it in because there were so many fish. That disciple whom Jesus loved said to Peter, “It is the Lord!” When Simon Peter heard that it was the Lord, he put on some clothes, for he was naked, and jumped into the sea. But the other disciples came in the boat, dragging the net full of fish, for they were not far from the land, only about a hundred yards off.

When they had gone ashore, they saw a charcoal fire there, with fish on it, and bread. 10 Jesus said to them, “Bring some of the fish that you have just caught.” 11 So Simon Peter went aboard and hauled the net ashore, full of large fish, a hundred fifty-three of them; and though there were so many, the net was not torn. 12 Jesus said to them, “Come and have breakfast.” Now none of the disciples dared to ask him, “Who are you?” because they knew it was the Lord. 13 Jesus came and took the bread and gave it to them, and did the same with the fish. 14 This was now the third time that Jesus appeared to the disciples after he was raised from the dead.


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A shrimp boat off the coast of South Carolina. (Much bigger than the Galilean boats!)

Thank you for the warm welcome. Thank you, Valerie and choir, for leading us in praise and worship. It is good to be back here on a day like this, full of joy and celebration!

When Pastor Dee mentioned that this was “Bright Sunday,” I pondered what post-Resurrection story brought me the most smiles. I tried to think — what Eastertide scripture portion brings in the most joy and love – after all, we are not remembering a funeral! We are resurrection people! This vignette from the end of the Gospel of John just makes me smile. A fishing story to end ALL fish stories.

Fishermen love to talk about the one that got away. Or the one that was THIS big. It might have been a minnow on the hook, but it was a WHALE by the time the tale is finished.

It reminds me of the story of a man who went off to do some fishing one weekend. He had absolutely no luck. Zero. None. Nada. About half way home, he sees a fish market, and he stops and says to the owner, “hey, throw me four of those medium sized rainbow trout.” The owner says, “throw them? Why?” The man says, “Well, at least that way, I can say I caught them.”
But wait… there’s more…  
The owner says, “Oh, is your name Jim? And is your wife’s name Cathy?” Puzzled, the man answers, “yes…” the owner responded, “Ok then, Cathy called. She wants you to bring home salmon instead.”
Ba-bum-bum…

Galilee
Photo Credit: “Sea of Galilee (Kinneret; Lake Tiberius)”, © 2018 Gary Todd, Flickr | PD-CC0 | via Wylio

We know that Peter, Andrew, James and John were all fisherman when they were called to be one of Jesus’ followers. In the Gospel of Luke, chapter 5, we can read about Jesus showing up on the shores of the Sea of Galilee, and inviting the four to become “fishers of people.” You remember the story? They had been fishing all night, and Jesus told them to row out into deeper water, and drop their nets yet again.

Bless Simon Peter! He probably could have used a lot saltier language but he said, “Master, we have worked all night long, but have caught nothing. Yet if you say so, I will let down the nets.” Can you hear the eye roll? IF YOU SAY SO…

You remember what happens next? They catch so many fish that their nets begin to break, their boats began to sink, and they had to be rescued by other boats to help haul in the catch.

You would think with such as auspicious beginning that they would remember…Not just this event, but the other miracles that Jesus did. But, apparently not.

After the risen Jesus appeared to the disciples in Jerusalem, in Matthew’s version anyway, Jesus told them to go ahead to Galilee, and he would meet them there. We do not have a time stamp, but it was probably a few weeks later when this morning’s Scripture took place.

How do we know this? It’s about 184 km or 114 miles from Jerusalem to Galilee. That is about 5 days of hard walking. Not a leisurely stroll. But because, in all likelihood, it wasn’t just “11 bros” going fishing, but their whole families and households, it was probably a two week hike, with a stop for the Sabbath. It was an intentional journey, not a casual whim.

They walked home. Walked. Probably still confused. Still debating what really happened. Just like us – you have 11 eye witnesses, and that means there are 15 versions of what happened – not to mention the debates about what it all means!
Did you see? Thomas stuck his HAND in Jesus’ side?
Mary said there was an angel!
Yeah, but the guards said there was an earthquake…

The disciples, the men and women who followed Jesus, were real people. They argued. They cried. They got tired. They got people-sick. They defended Jesus… and then denied Jesus. I think that they went home, perhaps to find answers, perhaps just to be rejuvenated by the smells and foods and sounds of home.

While we know that they traveled with Jesus all over, we don’t know how long it had been since they were home.  Have you ever journeyed back to your old school, your old neighborhood, maybe back to see family, and realize you are not the same? You don’t quite fit any more… but it’s all you know.

I think they were “disciples of amnesia.”
They had forgotten all that they had seen while traveling with Jesus. They had forgotten the improbable results. The unlikely people who would be followers of Christ.
They fell back into their old habits, their old haunts, their old occupations. They were tempted by the same old problems.

It’s like those of us who are enthusiastic gardeners and get all excited the first warm weekend of Spring. We go to the big box stores and see the baby tomato plants… and we forget that last frost is still coming. And those plants will surely die in the first cold night they are outside. Amnesia!

The disciples had amnesia.

In this morning’s passage, we hear words that are familiar from the passage I referenced earlier in Luke:

“You have no fish, have you?”

“NOooooo.” Now – I would bet – they had a few choice words more than just “NOooooo.”

But…

Nevertheless, when Jesus told them to cast the net on the other side of the boat, they did… and there were “so many fish!” And that was what jolted them out of their amnesia.

It took this huge, amazing, miraculous catch for them to do a double take and for “the disciple whom Jesus loved” (that is, JOHN), to realize that wasn’t just some kibbutzer standing on the shoreline – it was Jesus!

And Peter, bless him, was so excited that he jumped overboard and swam to the beach. John thought we needed to know that Peter fished in the buff and had to first put clothes on before he swam to shore. Ok then.

But… hear me… It took a miracle at daybreak, when they were tired, sore, and probably very frustrated, to FINALLY listen. And then to witness, with their own eyes, Jesus’ abundant gifts to them – “153 fish” – (I wonder – did someone COUNT them? John… apparently!)

onjal-machhiwad - navsari - gujarat - india
Photo Credit: “catch, onjal-machhiwad”, © 2011 nevil zaveri, Flickr | CC-BY | via Wylio

When God invites us to breakfast on the beach… what waits for us is the abundant, overwhelming, satisfying, compassionate love of God.

Jesus didn’t chastise or scold. He didn’t say, “Now didn’t I tell you to go to Galilee? I don’t remember saying ANYTHING about fishing.” Jesus used this extraordinary circumstance to remind them of the extraordinary, over-the-top, welcoming love of God.

Friends… maybe you… like me… are not exactly receptive to the suggestions of our friends and families when we are tired and disgusted and frustrated. When we are exhausted. When our best-laid plans don’t pan out.

Maybe you… like me… are really only receptive to help when we realize we are standing there with empty hands and an empty net. Maybe you… like me… are jolted out of our amnesia to remember…

God’s faithfulness
God’s compassion
God’s people willing to show love and mercy
God’s abundant provision

As Karoline Lewis says, “The resurrected Christ will be seen in displays of abundance. The ascended Christ will be known when his disciples establish opportunities to experience abundant grace.”[1]

Not “just enough” but an ABUNDANCE! Not just a token expression of God’s love, but an ABUNDANCE!

Abundant joy.
Abundant grace.
Abundant hope.

Cast out your nets.
See what God is waiting to do through you – through Bethesda UCC – through your homes – through your places of work.
Your nets will overflow.
Thanks be to God!

[1]Lewis, Karoline. John. Fortress Biblical Preaching Commentary.© 2014, Minneapolis, MN. Fortress Press. p.255

Sometimes you’re the shoes…

unholyweek

Yes. That was (past tense) a pair of my shoes. Before one of the cats had an Unfortunate Dietary Upheaval, they were beat up and dirty. And, since I left them in the wrong place, they were suddenly very un-wearable.

Life is like that sometimes. You do your best, and stuff happens.

Sometimes you don’t know the cause. (Neither cat has confessed.)

Sometimes you contributed to the problem. (I do have a shoe rack. I didn’t put them there.)

Sometimes it’s just being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

I was talking with someone recently who was going through a Series of Unfortunate Events (to borrow a little Lemony Snickett!) Lots of “stuff” was raining down on them. It was painful to watch… and it sucked! It was hard to go through it vicariously with them.

Then I came home from Maundy Thursday service and found my shoes. And it occurred to me that sometimes you are the shoes. Sometimes you suffer. Sometimes — because life isn’t fair, dammit, you are on the wrong end of the line that handed out lucky stars.

So you learn to laugh. And cry. And yeah, cuss a little. And you especially learn that while life isn’t fair, you can find ways to cope by leaning on people who know and love you. And they will lean on you…

 

Chaplain Tortoise

turtleplanking
From an unknown artist, speaking my truth.

There is progress. Slow and steady. Chaplain Tortoise,  here, is almost ready to go back to work on Tuesday!

Almost 2 weeks out from surgery, I’m feeling encouraged. (I’ll spare you a picture of my knee, minus the sutures.) The swelling is going down and I’m able to do simple things like stand up and sit down without pain. I can navigate steps (going up is easier than going down) but still find it difficult to do things like pick up a bag of groceries from the floor, or squat. (I probably could squat, but someone would have to rescue me.)

Now, as my surgeon says, I have a “better” knee, but I do not have a “healthy” knee. It will take some babying and strict rehab to get closer to normal functioning. And, though I hate to say it, I will have to start going to the gym regularly. My whole body will benefit (and I know this), but I’m just not someone who enjoys working out. And most of my friends are readers and knitters, not joggers and weight-lifters.

One of the realities I am facing, though, is that to get back to my personal “best” it will take some work. So I decided to check out the local gyms and fitness clubs, just to get a jump start on where I will end up after PT.

It was… interesting.

There was one that smelled like every high school gymnasium you’ve ever been in, minus the pull-out bleachers and whistles. Yeah… no.

There was one that appeared to have delusions of grandeur, with hardwood floors and a “eucalyptus” steam room. (Why? I don’t know). And a “day spa” where I could get a bikini wax and a facial after I work out. (Um. No.)

There was one that had row after row after row of treadmills and row machines, and not much else. Also no one on the floor who could teach a newbie how to use these things. My comment to the salesperson: “Look. I got this knee injury from walking. On a flat surface. I need a little more than a smile and wave.”

There was one that had pushy sales staff and warned me that “the price will go up if you don’t sign today.” (My response? “Oh well. Your loss.”)

Then there was the guy who schmoozed so much, I thought we would be meeting up with our spouses for a drink this weekend. Dude. I’m just looking for a place to work out. Your son is not marrying my daughter! (Creepy.)

And… my last stop, when I was almost ready to say fuggedaboudit, my search yielded a place with fairly normal people. People who get that I am not interested in being anything other than a better version of my best self. I think I’ll probably end up there. We’ll see.

I’m operating at a lower speed than normal, which has been frustrating. However, listening to my body has been key. (My knee definitely YELLS at me when I try to do too much!) Stepping back into mindfulness practices, I remembered that knowing and caring for myself is the best way to walk into a healthier me.

So for now, I’m Chaplain Tortoise… taking those baby steps towards healing. Slow and steady wins the race.

Echoing Footsteps

I am a part of all that I have met;
Yet all experience is an arch wherethro’
Gleams that untravell’d world, whose margin fades
For ever and for ever when I move.
– Alfred Lloyd Tennyson 

Our congregation is taking a “slowed-down” approach to Lent this year. Our main theme is “Restore My Soul” – finding ways to feel renewed and refreshed in the faith. We are focusing on being “un-busy.” There’s just too much in our culture that fights against a deeper, richer spiritual life.

I chose to use coloring again for my personal Lenten discipline as a means of reflection and self-expression. Especially with my current physical challenges from knee surgery, I need to be intentional in reflecting and listening to the Divine. So, I pulled out one of my favorite coloring books which has page after page of labyrinths to color. I flipped open to a fresh page and saw this:

labyrinthpast

The colors of a completed labyrinth from a previous Lent bled through the page opposite of the new labyrinth I began coloring today. I paused to wonder, “What echoes from my past am I walking with today??”

Positive or negative, challenges or success stories, I have internalized all of these past events. Some memories are faded, others push through with more of an impact. All of them are a part of me. All of them are essential to who I am and how I serve as a pastor and a chaplain. And even the hardest memories can be an asset and inform how I serve. But they also can be triggers and block me from doing my best.

Stumbling. Falling. Trying again. That’s a life that walks with Christ, day after day, year after year. Walking in the Divine’s grace and love. Always until forever.

Blessed be.